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Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2015 9:59 pm
by zebedee
Please be aware that the car park is for communal use by all residents in the property. Therefore you would need to agree that the bouncy castle would need to be made available for all the other residents of the property.
Your booking co-incides with the national Hammer House of Horror Society annual re-enactment conference who have booked the remainder of the apartments during your stay
Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2015 10:54 pm
by aasta
Have just been entertaining OH with this thread (...really too funny!!) ...
A recent guest from a big city, who came for a walking holiday complained about the dust and dirt on the walking paths and the need for "real walking shoes"???
Posted: Fri Sep 18, 2015 6:43 pm
by Essar
Essar wrote:I have just had an email from a guest who has booked 4-nights during the half-term hols - "would it be possible to hire a bouncy castle and put it in the car park".
This is for an apartment, 2 adults & 2 small children - I have not yet replied as I will have a sleep on it to consolidate my thoughts and come up with a suitable response.
Any comic suggestions would be appreciated and maybe used.
I've just thought of one:
"Sorry, Billy Smart's circus is using the car park that week"
Thank you for the ideas; unfortunately, I have my sensible hat on and replied this morning that she wouldn't be able to hire a bouncy castle and put it in the car park because it my get clamped for not having a parking permit. She actually replied "okay thank you I just thought I would ask anyway".
Posted: Fri Sep 18, 2015 9:34 pm
by Bunny
This thread has morphed slightly but here's another one. Recent guests originally submitted the booking form and completed the guests' names section as:
Mom
Dad
Auntie Mavis
Uncle Reg
Tom, Dick, Harry.
In the address section they just filled in the name of the road.
Posted: Fri Sep 18, 2015 9:45 pm
by teapot
Dick being the lead name? I'm guessing at Head for the surname
Posted: Fri Sep 18, 2015 10:49 pm
by Joanna
Bunny - what did you say to them? I would have seen red and probably cancelled the reservation on the spot (Because we don't let to just any Tom, Dick or Harry
).
Posted: Mon Sep 21, 2015 3:13 am
by catherinedonegal
Mouse wrote:
Great thread! Restores my faith in human stupidity.
Luckily we have had none for a couple of years year now.
Mouse
x
I haven't read all the way through yet but I am laughing so much!
Posted: Mon Sep 21, 2015 3:16 am
by catherinedonegal
lester1meg wrote:'It's too dark at night.'
I think they meant there are no streetlights in the middle of the Irish countryside.
LOVE IT!
Posted: Mon Sep 21, 2015 3:21 am
by catherinedonegal
Zur Alten Weinkelter wrote:" Where can i buy English food " ?
Emmm try England where you have just come from
enjoy Germany
*snorts*
Posted: Wed Sep 23, 2015 12:43 am
by catherinedonegal
GillianF wrote:"We'd never have come if we'd known it would be this hot!"
This is France, in August.
and
"Do you provide breakfast in the cottage?"
"No, sorry."
"Oh, good. We'll book."
Clearly word of your cooking abilities has spread far and wide
Anal complaints 2015
Posted: Fri Sep 25, 2015 7:01 am
by LeManoir
"The roads are too winding" (we're in the Dordogne)
"It's too sunny"
"These yoghurts have fruit and too much sugar: we want natural, sugar-free" - and when these were supplied, they heaped lots of jam on top.
Another guest said "The knob on the slow cooker has melted." It transpired that his daughter had taken out the middle ceramic section, complete with lid and non-heat-resistant knob, added ingredients, and put it in the oven. "She's not very good with ovens".
Still, it's make one smile (not in front of the guests, though) .
Posted: Fri Sep 25, 2015 7:30 am
by salmoncottage
"Our car had sand on it, If we'd known the beach was so close we'd have parked somewhere else".......
Posted: Fri Sep 25, 2015 6:54 pm
by Essar
"We notice there are two squares in Beverley - Saturday Market & Wednesday Market - do you know what days the markets are on?"
"Yes, Monday & Friday - alternate weeks during the summer and every other week during the rest of the year, except at Easter & Bank holidays when they are the day before or the day after."
Posted: Fri Sep 25, 2015 7:31 pm
by Bunny
Essar wrote:"We notice there are two squares in Beverley - Saturday Market & Wednesday Market - do you know what days the markets are on?"
"Yes, Monday & Friday - alternate weeks during the summer and every other week during the rest of the year, except at Easter & Bank holidays when they are the day before or the day after."
Sorry haven't quite grasped that. So are you saying it could be on any day of the week?
Posted: Fri Sep 25, 2015 7:50 pm
by FelicityA
From guests who just left "Your fork is too heavy".
Me: "Oh sorry to hear that - which one exactly are you talking about"
"All of them. I dropped one and the plate smashed! I have never seen such heavy forks!"
Evidently, I have given them too good quality. Silver plated and yes, they are heavier than your average 'holiday cutlery' I suppose, but you are not supposed to drop them from a height onto china! (And if you do, you normally apologise, not blame the fork!)