What are my guests doing in there?

From the moment they step through the door your bookings become guests, and their experiences determine whether they ever come back.
Jemima Copping
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What are my guests doing in there?

Post by Jemima Copping »

My new guests arrived on Saturday. Seemed like a pleasant young couple, although the girl was dressed rather strangely in a pale pink chiffon party dress and red high heeled shoes. Not exactly the sort of gear that most people wear when they are coming to a cottage in the back of beyond. Since then they haven't been seen. The curtains are closed all day except for the bedroom. Last night the car left the property for about an hour and then came back. The car hasn't left the place since then. Why are the curtains closed, obscuring the wonderful view? What are they doing in there?
Better to be mutton dressed as lamb than mutton dressed as mutton!
Hells Bells
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Post by Hells Bells »

Filming a porn movie?
Marks
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Post by Marks »

Horizontal jogging? :wink:
Some guests just need a sympathetic pat. On the head. With a hammer.
Ecosse
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Post by Ecosse »

Our neighbours had a couple like that just last week... your guests aeren't Northern Irish perchance? I had the briefest of conversations with the guy on the first day where he was very pleasant and revealed he was on his honeymoon. For the next 10 days, they hardly moved from the chalet (only the new husband went out... he seemed to be tasked with buying more fruit on a number of occasions... the mind boggles), they scuttled out together on only two occasions and the rest of the time stayed in with the curtains closed. I don't know why they booked a holiday in the Alps when a cheap room in Milton Keynes would have given them the same experience!
Jemima Copping
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Post by Jemima Copping »

All these scenarios have occurred to me! I did ask if they were on their honeymoon but, nope, they said they'd been married for 3 years. And no, they aren't Irish but Indian. Maybe trying out all the positions of the Kama Sutra? 400 I believe!
Better to be mutton dressed as lamb than mutton dressed as mutton!
SarahV
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Post by SarahV »

What I wouldn't give for a holiday like that right now 😉
Jemima Copping
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Post by Jemima Copping »

:shock: :shock: :shock: :D :D :D :D
It would be better with room service though!
Better to be mutton dressed as lamb than mutton dressed as mutton!
SarahV
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Post by SarahV »

I must admit that we spent large chunks of our sunny holiday in France.....watching the 1975 version of Poldark on DVD 😳😳😳
Lord knows what the neighbours thought but in my defence we watched it with my 10 daughter and we spent some lovely family time together 😂
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PW in Polemi
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Post by PW in Polemi »

Jemima Copping wrote::shock: :shock: :shock: :D :D :D :D
It would be better with room service though!
Depends on the room service staff :lol: :lol:

I remember when we used to go on holiday - we only had the one 2 week break a year, and by the time it came round, we were so absolutely dog tired, we spent most of the first week sleeping! :shock: :lol:
Dogs have masters. Cats have slaves!
Jemima Copping
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Post by Jemima Copping »

Finally they surfaced and OH met them in the local supermarket. They said how lovely the cottage is and how much they like it.
The closed curtains? I still don't quite understand that as no-one can see in. Maybe that's what they do at home. Last year we had a Brazilian couple who couldn't figure out how to lock the door ( you have to push the handle up to lock from the inside) and spent their first night wide awake because they were afraid soneone was going to break in. Which happens in Brazil apparently on a regular basis.
Better to be mutton dressed as lamb than mutton dressed as mutton!
ianh100
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Post by ianh100 »

What's wrong with Milton Keynes?
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greenbarn
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Post by greenbarn »

ianh100 wrote:What's wrong with Milton Keynes?
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: Good one!
ianh100
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Post by ianh100 »

Lol, I was serious, I live there. It is however 150 miles from my holiday rentals. Perhaps I proved my own point there.....
Ecosse
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Post by Ecosse »

Ha ha sorry, ianh100, no sleight of your home town intended... I just randomly chose a place that people have heard about, but isn't a known holiday destination. Correct me if I'm wrong on the latter!
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greenbarn
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Post by greenbarn »

gitemontjoly wrote: I just randomly chose a place that people have heard about, but isn't a known holiday destination.
When in doubt, choose Slough.
Or Basingstoke.
I've worked in both.
They're not holiday destinations... :wink:
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