A Friendly*!% Predicament

[ginelli]

Hi everyone,

There is this American guy I've known now for about 3 years. We met through work (I'm a tour guide) and we have struck up such a good working relationship that he requests me as his guide for a school tour he does every year. Basicaly, I'm onto a good thing and I don't want to spoil it.

He wants to book my place in France in October:

"Gino, Do these dates work for your property. . . . .Oct 10 to Oct 17th, 2007. Hopefully this will be the final correction. How would you like payment Chris - Cathy will be staying there also. . . .4 adults."

I just can't decide how to proceed with this booking. Do I still get him to sign a rental agreement? Do I get him to pay according to the rules (he'll have to pay 3.9% for paypal or a wire fee) or just ask him to give it to me personally in June? Do I take a security deposit off him?

There is cultural stuff going on here. The Italian in me says it's insulting to treat friends this way. I can already hear the answers from our Anglo-Saxon members out there: "Of course you get him to sign a rental agreement!!!"

At the end of the day the guy in question is an American from Northern European stock so, as my fiance says, I'm making a fuss about nothing. Can anyone give me any advice which treads a smooth diplomatic line?

Thanks,

G

[Alan Knighting]

There is cultural stuff going on here. The Italian in me says it's insulting to treat friends this way. I can already hear the answers from our Anglo-Saxon members out there: "Of course you get him to sign a rental agreement!!!"

Well, it’s really up to you. If anything goes wrong you could do the “Italian thing� and, with uncontrollable excitement, scream and shout at each other or you could do the “Anglo-Saxon thing� and calmly rely on your rental agreement. Failing all else, you could do the “Turkish thing� and cut his head off.

Just in case this is truly a cultural thing I am answering tongue in cheek.

Fluffy

[greenfrog]

Hi,

Perhaps you could tell him you need a signed rental agreement for insurance / accounting / legal purposes, and make it seem perfectly natural, accompanied by a chatty e-mail.

Whether you charge him full price or give him a friend's discount should be down to how you feel about it and, perhaps, whether or not it's peak season. Perhaps a welcome gift of some local wine and produce would work just as well as a friendship gesture?


Elaine

[debk]

Do I still get him to sign a rental agreement? Do I get him to pay according to the rules (he'll have to pay 3.9% for paypal or a wire fee) or just ask him to give it to me personally in June? Do I take a security deposit off him?

For what it's worth, when we have friends stay -- and it happens quite a bit -- we:

1. Always get rental agreement approval.
This is for their benefit, too, so there are no surprises or unfortunate misunderstandings. Alan's legal point is an excellent one, too.

2. Always pay according to the rules. Why not?
I've found that friends, perhaps more than the average renter, need the "nudge" that a booking deposit creates in terms of finalizing, truly truly truly finalizing, those dates. And sticking with them afterwards!! The fact that nothing goes on the calendar until the deposit is received here is a natural incentive to make a decision.

3. Never take a damage deposit.
Here is the place that we feel we can express our friendship without straining it via avoidable misunderstandings (especially related to #1 and #2, above).

Good luck!
debk

[Giddy Goat]

For what it's worth, when we have friends stay -- and it happens quite a bit -- we:

2. Always pay according to the rules. Why not? I've found that friends, perhaps more than the average renter, need the "nudge" that a booking deposit creates in terms of finalizing, truly truly truly finalizing, those dates. And sticking with them afterwards!! The fact that nothing goes on the calendar until the deposit is received here is a natural incentive to make a decision. debk

Agree 100% about this. On another thread, I have said the same thing - friends, and friends of friends, are notoriously bad at taking your business seriously; left to their own devices, they can be seriously casual. Result - embarrassment, prolonged uncertainty,and a strained relationship.

[Partridge]

Hi, I must admit I also do not take a damage deposit when I know the people concerned. So I agree with Deb

[ginelli]

Stunning advice everybody. To think that this had been grating me for weeks and you give me the answers in an afternoon!

Hey Alan, I'm going to call my brothers now

g

[Guest3]

I must admit I also do not take a damage deposit when I know the people concerned. So I agree with Deb

We've only had 3 lots of bookings from friends and on all occasions I followed my normal procedure...booking form sent (to be completed, signed and returned), deposit within 5 days and balance 8 weeks before departure. However, I did not take a damage deposit from them.

[Fraise]

Yep, I agree with all of this as well. I did take a damage deposit from the first lot, but felt guilty about it and haven't since

[gh]

Hi everyone,

There is this American guy I've known now for about 3 years.

There is cultural stuff going on here. The Italian in me

Can relate to what you are saying, MOH is Italian who has many family who came en mass to us and we had a great time at our place with 3 generations (20 - 85), however, it was when they chose too come . Should point out that we have the use of MOH 'family' house near to Roma

My advise do what you know is right from the heart.

Helen

[ginelli]

I'd already given a £50 discount and, since starting this thread, have emailed him with all the normal procedures minus the security deposit

[gh]

Idea buona. Gino buono di notte.