Lay My Hat

Yep I agree something is bold is good but the first time I read this sentence immediately I clicked onto something else as it was so offputting I always work on the principal that I'm not unique and what I do others will do too and its such a shame as it actually a very good website after this sentence.

I like your simple enjoy 320 days of sun one though....

Think I'll re examine my own front page now....

Actually I really admire all your people who put your websites on here to be slaughted opps sorry added value too - I could never be so brave Good on you!

Hi Davey

Crisp and classy site. Only negative from my point of view is,
as already mentioned by Ju, no prices.
When I compare properties I like to have all the common facts
available and on that basis your property wouldn't make my final list.

Cheers
Ian

Hi Davey,

I'm with fibi on this - the text needs some serious work. Most of it is easily changed.
eg at the top of the page, over the pic, I like the "Welcome to Polaris World". And "welcome" as the tab for the home page is nice. But then your first sentence welcomes me to the site... Your site is just a tool to get me to book your apartment. Getting people to the site is not your aim so welcome them to your property, not the site.

The first sentence needs to be totally rewritten - it's trying to say too much and therefore says nothing. And then you repeat much of the info underneath...

The layout is nice, the pix are good and the place looks lovely.

But I'm with others who've pointed out there are no prices. If I were looking there I'm pretty sure I wouldn't waste the mere two minutes it would take to send an inquiry email cos I have no idea whatsoever if you're in my price range.

Hope this helps! Good luck with the rewrites.

Thanks all for the constructive help It is appreciated

Thanks all for the constructive help...It is appreciated

You're welcome but are you going to act on any of it

davey,

why have you not changed that horrible first sentence in bold????

Please do not ask for help and then do nothing - we are all busy busy people who actually WANT to help but you have to do your bit too

fibi wrote:why have you not changed that horrible first sentence in bold????

If you were only going to change one thing then that's the one to go for, it's atrocious. I probably constructed better sentences when I was 10, and I just missed out on my 11+, so wasn't particularly clever

Also, the title tag is displaying the website's URL, not good for SEO. Needs to be descriptive.

Sorry everyone but the site was built by a third party for me and they have been busy and so have I, all of your recommendations are greatful and are noted, please dont feel I am ignoring them, the website isnt sent to people yet, its for you all to look at and give opinions It will be changed

they have been busy and so have I

What? Busier than me, busier than us? They don't even have to think, we've laid it all on for them